One year anniversary

When I started this blog a year ago, I had great expectations.  I thought I'd post every day, or at the very least once a week, unleashing my thoughts, opinions, and unique perspective out into the world.  Well, it didn't happen.  I posted semi-regularly for the first few months, but then I started massage school and suddenly it was hard to find time for the basics - like eating and showering - let alone blogging.  So blogging fell low on my list of priorities, and it just sat there in it's sad little place on the web, untouched, uninspired and forgotten. 

Honestly, I never really asked myself why I wanted to blog in the first place.  It just seemed like the natural thing to do - something I was drawn to.  But why?  Sure, I love to journal - I've been writing in a diary since the age of nine - but why would I want to journal publicly? I'm not particularly attention-seeking.  In fact, I hate being the center of attention, so why would I want to put it all out there for everyone to see if I'm not interested in getting attention?  Maybe it's about connecting to the world after being a SAHM for 2.5 years?  Maybe the creative part of my brain was feeling neglected and needed an outlet?  Or maybe I had hopes of generating some ad income to fulfill my need to "contribute" to the household in a monetary way?  I'd be the first to admit that making the shift from independent, self-sustaining woman to SAHM was rocky and unsettling, and even after 4+ years of being supported by my husband I'm still struggling with this. 

Well, last month I decided to take a break from school because the schedule wasn't working for me or my family, and now I have a little more free time on my hands.  So, among the myriad of spirit-enriching things I'd like to dive into, like sumi-e painting, knitting, cooking, baking, organizing my house, planning meals, exercising, and meditating, blogging seems to have risen high on the list.  So blog I will, even though the reasons aren't clear.  I will follow the way.